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“If there’s not an immediate spark, you’re wasting both of your time,” says Manley.The advice used to be to avoid talk of politics and former relationships on early dates, but now many favor putting it all out there from the beginning.“A week later, maybe you’d be like, ‘I should reach out.’” Gone are the days when dates had to be an elaborate night out at a buzzy restaurant or club.Now, watching a few episodes of “Westworld” is considered a hot date. “Even if you don’t have sex while you watch, you can finish a show and have something to talk about.” A survey found that millennials are 270 percent more likely than other generations to be turned on if their match watches the same TV show.“Someone can have a fantastic date, but when they get an email [from a dating service] with three other matches,” says Maria Avgitidis, dating coach and founder of Agape Match in Midtown, “fear of missing out takes effect.” But it’s important that everyone is up front about dating other people.“You have to be really clear on what you want,” says Lindsay Chrisler, a professional dating coach based in Hell’s Kitchen. “Everything goes down over text now, especially between millennials,” Manley says.Agape Match’s Avgitidis says that dating sites have seen a big uptick in people noting their political preferences on their profiles.“I used to say, ‘Don’t let ideology get in the way of love,’ [but] I think when people meet other people, they want to know what their values and lifestyles are,” she says.
With time, a no-strings hookup could turn into something more.But such shenanigans are now considered passé, given how we’re all constantly looking at our smartphones.“I don’t want to be with someone who’s going to play games and feel weird if I text them to say hello,” Donahue says.Just don’t overdo it, and remember that humor and tone don’t always come through in a text.“[Texting] is a great way to flirt, maybe give them a taste of who you are,” says dating coach Chrisler.
“There are definitely guys who would be really into a woman taking charge like that,” says Manley.